Day 13221 & I finally got a good night's sleep

When I was in college, post dorm days, living in my first apartment on Elliston Place with a friend named Karina, I had this futon. Damn, I really loved that futon. Now, keep in mind, I am not saying that I loved the look or the design of it as a piece of furniture; rather, I loved the sleep that I got on the best futon mattress that has ever existed. Just the right amount of give, firmness, blah, blah blah. It was a queen. As I slept alone on it well over 50% of the time, it was also quite roomy for one.

Cut to the past year. We have been "sleeping" on the same queen size Sealy for the last 10 years (3652 days.)  I use quotes because I cannot really consider that it has been sleep of any real quality as of late. Rather, each evening was a well choreographed dance between us. If he moved, then I had to move to help the springs balance out, reclaim my allocated space, and stay far enough away from the heat that he seems to generate (imagine sleeping with a kerosene heater in bed with you.)

For awhile, I used to anxiously await the 5 o'clock am hour. You see, Jay gets up at 5 most mornings (sometimes he sleeps in till 5:30). This would be the time that I was able to sprawl across the bed and make up for several poor hours of tossing and turning. Alas, the last few months, the bed would not even allow me this early AM respite from its torturous grip. Every time Jay got up, I found myself rolling into the ravine that was the center of the bed, trapped like one of those hikers that get caught in some chasm while wandering lost in the snow.

Drum roll, please...

Behold! A king size Sealy Posturpedic, Spring Free, Latex Core, pillowtop (and a swanky 4 poster frame that seems to fit in the bedroom like it was designed to be there...) I have to say, I feel I have robbed myself of a few years and some of my youthful appearance because of being cheap and not wanting to spring for the kingsize bed and all its necessities. I am a moron. (And, I found 1200 threadcount king size sheet sets at Sams for 99.00, by the way. Sure, Oprah wouldn't sleep on them, but clearly, I am not Oprah)

The beauty of this mattress, for me, lies in its remarkable similarity to that futon mattress of yore. Just the right amount of firm, etc...And talk about what a difference a few inches in width can make (hee hee.) I might as well be sleeping in Nebraska. After 14 years (5126 days) together, it is nice to have a little time apart.

The bonus to all of this? I feel like I am really contributing to the economy. Nobody is going to accuse me of allowing this recession in with open arms. No sir.  Not me.

And really, it is the least I can do, despite the fact that I won't be getting any 600.00 bonus check from the government. Screw you, W! I am going to go hide 600.00 under my new mattress.  The last word will always be mine, bitches!!!